Pavel Chekov Wears Rocket Ship Underoos

So, in honor of the torture so many of you guys are going through, I have decided that it should be finals time at Starfleet Academy.

Who's cheating? Who's making up insane tests (Tony Giotto) and who is just praying to get by?

Oh, but it's never that simple, is it?

The comm system has just begun to act.. weird. Sometimes it bounces messages for no reason. Sometimes it sends to the wrong person. Sometimes it sends to EVERYONE on someone's list. Resending old messages to new recipients.

And its favorite trick? Sending old deleted messages. Not everyone has caught on yet, and this is NOT the kind of distraction they need right now.

So, what happens when all hell breaks out... and they still have to pass astrogation?

You guys we ate all the comments on the last HSAU9 and never got to the plot. We had too many angsts.

(At 5000 comments LJ starts captchaing EVERY COMMENT and that is annoying. I hate it.)

So. It's WednesdayTUESDAY Morning, right after we left off on the last post.

Dave and Mia are going on their trip... if Dave didn't fuck it with Avery.
Pav and Kiki are cuddled up in his bed.
Caz and Tony are at her apartment, where she's having a hell of a time.
No one remembered Spock's birfday, not even his journal.
On the other hand, Hadley and Green and Jackson fucked on the beach.

Over at Botany Bay, Suzy and Laz and Lazzy and Quin had DRAMZ.


On Friday of this week, the two schools will meet for their competition. And then there will be an awards banquet.

And does anyone know who these random future-themed people running around are?

Modly things!!

1) I floated the idea of a secret santa a while ago, but I'd like greater input. Based of exchanges I used to run for another comm, the idea would be this:
-I make a post. HELLO!
-You comment to the post (readers, players, etc.) and say "OOOH, I LOVE THESE THREE CHARACTERS/SHIPS! Also here is how to contact me!" - These would be screened so only I, OZ THE GREAT AND POWERFUL or whatever could see them.
-I whip out a random number generator and give you an assignment.
-You then have x amount of time to write/draw/create a fannish thing for your santee.
-Then you send it to me and I make a post all "HEY GUYZ LOOKIT!" and you go "ooooh" and "aaaah".
-I was thinking a late secret santa because I'm sure a lot of you are involved in other exchanges and a due date in January might make it easier to participate?

2) A reader in Kitty's last post asked for a round-up of events of the HSAUs. I tried to do this but got about 1/100th of the way through the first before going "HOLY FUCK THERE ARE NINE OF THESE!?!?" and killing myself. It got better. So. I would like a volunteer (or 9) who might be willing to just summarize the MAJOR events of each installment. If you want to remain anon, you can email me at laurendf at gmail. I am discreet and disease free.

3) Speaking of the HSAU: Our guys are very close to graduation right now. Here is the big question: Do we want to make this into a Starfleet Academy AU?
The other option would be ending and either starting a BRAND NEW HSAU! or a BRAND NEW SUPERGAME!

4) Hay readers, do you want a post of your own to talk to each other and go "OMG THEY DID WHUUUUUUUT? GURL, I NEVER THOUGHT THEY'D TURN MARLA INTO A FICUS WITH A BAD ATTITUDE!" or just squee over how cute Bones/Kirk and Chekov/Sulu and Giotto/McKenna are being?

5) There is no five. Go about your business.

WELCOME TO SPRING!

March 1- The beginning of that "OH MY GOD IS IT SPRING BREAK YET" lull where nothing happens and everyone is getting bored.

Luckily, Archer has just announced that, in lieu of the Copernicus trip this year, there is to be a three-part competition with another school in San Francisco - Botany Bay HS. All seniors are required to participate.

The competiton will be in three parts:, and if you've ever watched one of those camps where the fat kids beat the jocks, you know what's coming.

Part one will be athletic: One team of 5 people from each school will compete in a number of trackand field events. Botany Bay is expected to take everything except the actual running events. Because Pavel.

Part two is creative: One team of seniors will be in charge of designing, producing and otherwise creating a tribute to their school. This is a toss-up.

Part three is scientific: Each school will be building a shuttle. Pieces will be procured from the Fleet, and the remaining seniors will be expected to build a working shuttle craft. Points will be given for originality, but the teams can only use the equipment provided to them. EA should take this one, but BB has some tricks up their sleeves.

The prize? The winning school will be treated to a concert by "The Bleatles" - a new-wave band made up of sheep housing the DNA of the original Beatles. They're HUGE.

In addition, the winners will be treated to a tour of the almost-completed Enterprise, complete with a test run out to Saturn and back.

So, what team is everyone on? Who is going to throw their underwear at Sheep-Ringo? (And how can you tell Sheep-Ringo from regular Ringo? Is there a chart?) AND! What will happen if our Heroes go into space?

I DON'T KNOW!


WARNING!!ON PAGE 55 THROUGH PAGE 57, there is a discussion of sex had by characters which may be construed as rape. If this is a trigger for you, please avoid the conversation between McKenna and Sulu.

You have pleased your NinjaMod with the gift of TERRIBLE prons, and so I bring you the gift of our latest HSAU. I think, in all technicality, it's #8. But I've decided to use Pixy's system.

Okay, so when last we met:
-Chekov Sr. broke out of jail, killed Marla, and fucked off in a cloaked ship for who knows where. So that was good.
-Before he did that, Apraxin, one of the other mobsters, poisoned Hikaru, but Pavel blames his dad. So that was bad.
-Ricky and Riley broke up. So that was bad, too.
-But Riley and Kyle are trying to work it out, so if you're not Ricky you might be okay with that?
-Caroline spilled to Tony that Dave Galloway is in love with him and they had ANGST at each other. So that was bad.

And, of course, Pike and Number One are getting married. And I think that's where were going to pick up.

12/21 - a Sunday. Things are quiet. Probably too quiet.

Somewhere in the mist, Hadley, Jackson and Green are laying a trap. Number One is putting on her wedding dress. Pike is wishing his best man hadn't gotten him quite so dunk last night.

And in a few hours, at my signal, hell will be unleashed.

Something strange is happening on the USS Enterprise.

They've been out on their mission for 6 months, and people are starting to act... off. Some people think it's just cabin fever or homesickness. Others are not so sure, as this is strange behavior indeed.

Why did Sulu flush a geranium out the airlock?
Why did Chekov order a strawberry daiquiri from the synthesizer?
Why did Riley refuse ice cream?
Why did McCoy insist that he was, in fact, a bricklayer?
Since when does Scotty call the ship a detestable bucket of bolts?
What does Gaila mean by "Not in the mood"?

And why has elusive captain James T. Kirk never been photographed with Batman?

WELL I DON'T KNOW. YOU TELL ME!

It's Fall.
Leaves are changing colors, pumpkins are sprouting up min roadside stands, and somewhere, this commercial is playing.
Yes. Back to school.

September 1. Our Heroes are trudging back to Old EA, books in hand.


What did they do over their summer vacations? Well!
Christine and Spock have been married for two months, and have ALMOST decided what color curtains to get.

Pavel had a hot steamy Italian affair with a boy named Anthony and his car. And then he and Gaila played physics.

Caroline ran around the Mediterranean with Tony.

Hikaru gallivanted around Asia with his family and a man with the last name of "Kim" who will some day have a great-nephew named Harry.

Jim and Bones got jobs as ice cream guys in their own hover truck. They made no money, and got a few nasty infections from dubious use of the icecream scoop.

Huey, Dewey and Louie were lifeguards and might have gone all the way.

AND! Chris Pike got an engagement ring that he's totally going to give to Number One. Soon. Maybe tomorrow. Leave him alone. Tomorrow, for sure.


Of course, there have been some changes:
- Who is this Mr. Mudd, the mysterious new combat teacher, and since when has Archer been married?
- Pavel and Hikaru have been broken up for MONTHS and not seen each other.
- Ricky broke his leg two days ago and is utterly annoyed at trying to get around.

Finally, McGivers' trial is coming up, and the kids who were there will have to testify.


And, of course, the contest that got us here, the project to create an invention to better mankind's path through the stars, will be starting up soon. And here are some teams:
TEAM 4:
C. Chapel
L. McCoy
J. Rand
N. Uhura

TEAM 6:
S. Spock
R. Singh
J. Tormolen

TEAM 7:
P. Chekov
C. McKenna
H. Sulu

TEAM 10:
R. Ensyne
J. Kyle
K. Riley

TEAM 15:
J. Kirk
M. Scott
Gaila


So, without further blah blah blah, get to it!

LAST TIME, On HSAU:

-The gang went to the Giotto Vineyards, outside of Isola Rizza, for the wedding of Christine Chapel and [Data Error] Spock.

-Spock was replaced by an AU imposter, but they got ride of him and also KIRK AND BONES SAID THEY LOVED EACH OTHER. OMG FUCKING FINALLY.

-Caroline McKenna killed some plants, and to make it up to Hikaru Sulu, she loaned him Tony Giotto's Lamborghini, Anabelle.

-While attempting road head, Sulu crashed the car. Chekov, the head-giver, suffered three broken ribs. Sulu, the recipient and driver, suffered a fractured skull and some memory loss. To try and save him, McKenna agrees to kiss Sulu, which was seen by Chekov, Spock, Chapel, and Chapel's dad, Neil Patrick Harris.

-Meanwhile, Lucy's not-imaginary friend-from-the-past, Al, sent her a letter saying she wouldn't be seeing him again. A+ SEVEN-YEAR-OLD ANGST.

-So they got some shit, and a fan and combined them: Chekov and Sulu broke up, neither is talking to Caroline, and all three are miserable.

As we open, it is the morning of the wedding. Caroline and Hikaru will have to get it together enough to perform their MoH/Best Man duties.

And now, here comes the bride all dressed in... nothing?