Side Game: Dystopia

[http://users.livejournal.com/_samalander/]

In the world you are entering, there is a Federation. There is an Enterprise. There is even a Captain Kirk.

But in this world, they are not as you know them.

George Lowther, 27, is the captain of the pirate ship known throughout the galaxy as the Enterprise. Of course, he's not the real George Lowther, and neither was the man before him, a fellow called Chris Pike. They're in the process of trading the identity, so Pike can retire, having made his fortune. The new Lowther, real name James T. Kirk, has hired on a crew, and they're off on their first voyage, affiliated with the Federation of Interstellar Pirates.

So. How's the crew doing? And, of course, who's fucking?

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: McCoy, Leonard
Recipient: Chapel, Christine

He's not, he's just a pain in my ass that I'm still figuring out how to deal with.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Lowther, George
Recipient: Pike, Christopher

Hot pepper or just pepper? Cause both could be a pain in the ass.

Will you wear the pink apron?

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Chapel, Christine
Recipient: McCoy, Leonard

Yes, yes. Whatever you say. You know, if you ever did want to dump me to go off and be disgustingly monogamous and schmoopy with him, there would be no hard feelings.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Pike, Christopher
Recipient: Lowther, George

Just black pepper, but a lot of it. Damn weird malfunction.

I will never wear the pink apron.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: McCoy, Leonard
Recipient: Chapel, Christine

You're a handful. I can barely stand the kid, I'm not looking to date him.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Lowther, George
Recipient: Pike, Christopher

Sounds sneezy.

What if I ordered you to? As captain?

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Chapel, Christine
Recipient: McCoy, Leonard

Am I now? I don't suppose you'd like to take this handful in that supply closet over there? I'm sure you're not.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Pike, Christopher
Recipient: Lowther, George

It was interesting.

I'll pull seniority and ignore you.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: McCoy, Leonard
Recipient: Chapel, Christine

Yes indeed you are. I think I might be open to that idea.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Chapel, Christine
Recipient: McCoy, Leonard

Might be? Oh dear, has my appeal really waned that quickly?

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Lowther, George
Recipient: Pike, Christopher

I wonder if a person can be allergic to pepper.

But I'll make poutyfaces.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Lowther, George
Recipient: McCoy, Leonard

Can a person be allergic to regular, black pepper?

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: McCoy, Leonard
Recipient: Chapel, Christine

Oh don't worry darlin' you're plenty appealing. And I know a few ways to show it if you're doubting.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: McCoy, Leonard
Recipient: Lowther, George

Yes but it's relatively uncommon.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Chapel, Christine
Recipient: McCoy, Leonard

Am I now? Oh really? And what ways would those be?

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Pike, Christopher
Recipient: Lowther, George

I don't see why not.

You're not 6 anymore that doesn't work.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Lowther, George
Recipient: McCoy, Leonard

K, thanks!

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Lowther, George
Recipient: Pike, Christopher

The doctor says it's very likely and I may die of it.

You weren't there when I was six. Making up for lost time.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Pike, Christopher
Recipient: Lowther, George

Yes, well, you're a special case.

I've seen the holos. And I stopped in when I could.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: McCoy, Leonard
Recipient: Chapel, Christine

Oh yes, you're a damn fine woman Chapel. Well, I think they're better demonstrated, but I will tell you this, I'll let you make all the noise you want this time.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: McCoy, Leonard
Recipient: Lowther, George

Welcome.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Chapel, Christine
Recipient: McCoy, Leonard

Thank you, but you can call me Christine you know. Good, I want the whole ship to hear what you do to me.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: Lowther, George
Recipient: Pike, Christopher

Yes, I am. I could also die of sarcasm, use that sparingly.

Holos don't due my doe-eyed, tow-headed cuteness even a bit of justice.

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: McKenna, Caroline
Recipient: Sulu, Hikaru

You know how I have that inexplicable ability to know when someone else is having sex? Hikaru. Someone else is having sex. Right now. We should have sex, too!

[(Anonymous)]

Sender: McCoy, Leonard
Recipient: Chapel, Christine

Alright, Christine it is, didn't want to presume. And I can't wait to hear all the sounds I can drag out of you. Now hurry up, we're wasting precious time.